In the high-octane action of Marvel Rivals, survival often comes down to how quickly you can nope out of a bad situation. NetEase’s hero shooter has blessed most Strategists with slick escape options that would make Houdini jealous.
But then there’s Adam Warlock. Poor, golden, cosmically-powered Adam Warlock, whose idea of “escaping” is about as effective as trying to outrun a tsunami while wearing concrete shoes.
While Luna Snow ice-slides to safety and Rocket Raccoon jetpacks away from danger, Adam’s left standing there with his Soul Bond ability, essentially saying “if I’m going down, we’re all feeling it together.” It’s less of an escape and more of a cosmic group hug with pain.
When every other strategist gets wings but you get friendship bracelets
The disparity between Adam Warlock and his fellow Strategists in Marvel Rivals becomes painfully obvious the moment an enemy Iron Fist decides your backline looks particularly inviting. Let’s look at the evidence:
Strategists when they’re jumped by the enemy team:
byu/Imawot inmarvelrivals
This meme perfectly captures the existential crisis every Adam Warlock main experiences roughly every 15 seconds in a match. While other Strategists are pulling disappearing acts worthy of a Vegas magic show, Adam’s just standing there with his Will Poulter face.
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And there’s Adam’s vaunted “escape plan” in all its glory—desperately clicking buttons while praying to the cosmic entities that your aim suddenly improves enough to fend off that caffeinated Black Panther who’s treating your face like a scratching post.
The real kicker is that Adam Warlock isn’t even bad—he’s actually one of the highest damage Strategists in the game. He’s basically a Duelist in disguise who can occasionally remember to heal his teammates. But when it comes to mobility? The training dummies in the practice range have better escape options.
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That comment nails Adam’s entire survival philosophy. His Soul Bond doesn’t help him escape—it just ensures everyone gets to experience his suffering together. It’s less “I’m outta here” and more “misery loves company.”
How to survive as the golden sitting duck of Marvel Rivals
Despite his mobility issues, Adam Warlock mains have developed their own unique survival strategies. These typically involve positioning that would make chess grandmasters proud and the situational awareness of a paranoid spy.
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This player gets it. When you have no escape, your only option is to turn into a jumping, healing, shooting pinball and pray that your erratic movements confuse the enemy long enough for your team to notice you’re being murdered.
The truth is, Adam’s lack of mobility is balanced by his ridiculous damage output and resurrection abilities. In the right hands, he can turn a teamfight faster than Loki can change allegiances. But that doesn’t make it any less hilarious when every other Strategist zooms away from danger while Adam just stands there, menacingly.
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Sometimes, the best defense is a good Will Poulter reaction gif. Adam mains have learned to embrace their immobility with a zen-like acceptance that would make actual cosmic entities proud.
What’s your experience with Adam Warlock? Are you a master of the standing-still-and-hoping-for-the-best technique, or have you found clever ways to compensate for his lack of mobility? Share your cosmic wisdom in the comments below!
This post belongs to FandomWire and first appeared on FandomWire
