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Parents reveal top 20 most unhelpful pieces of advice they’ve received

Dani Dyer holding a "Mum" mug.
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Dani Dyer listens to white noise album ‘Soothing Sounds’, created by JOHNSON’S™ Baby.

PARENTS have revealed the most unhelpful advice they received during the first 12 months of having a child: ‘I did this, and my kids turned out fine’.

A poll of 1,000 mums and dads who’ve welcomed their first child during the past five years found they received 25 pieces of advice a week during the year after having a baby.

Dani Dyer holding a "Mum" mug.
Reality star and mum of three, Dani Dyer

Other less than helpful pointers included ‘sleep when the baby sleeps’, ‘you’re not holding them correctly,’ and ‘babies should be left to cry it out’.

But some of the offered advice was productive – pointers like ‘let your baby develop at their own pace’ and ‘trust your own instincts’ emerged as some of the most practical words of wisdom.

The research was commissioned by Johnson’s Baby, which has created a white noise album – ‘Soothing Sounds’ – made up of parenting advice and intended as a tool for parents.

The album was created using a mix of sounds from blogs, social media and personal anecdotes – highlighting how much unsolicited advice is thrown at new parents and which can be difficult to screen out what’s useful, from what’s not.

The noise of parenting advice was arranged by a music producer to create a more relaxing ‘soundscape’ using vocals, melody and percussion turning what could be perceived as aggravating, into something positive and more enjoyable to hear – for babies as well as their mums and dads.

The tracks are designed to complement a baby’s day from wake up to first nap to its bath time and bedtime.

Reality star and mum of three, Dani Dyer, who is working with the baby brand, said: “When you first have your baby, it can seem like everyone’s got something to say.

“Of course, this can be so lovely and helpful, but when it’s too much, it becomes overwhelming – especially when you add things like social media in.

“My babies adore white noise – me, less so.

“So, I’m delighted that they have created something so soothing which the whole family can benefit from.”

Other unhelpful pieces of advice parents were given include ‘you must have a second baby after the first’, ‘don’t let them sleep in your bed or they’ll never leave’ and for breastfeeding mums the classic ‘if you just relax the milk will flow”.

With 93 per cent regularly receiving advice from others in that first year, just 59 per cent of the advice they were given in that period was deemed actually useful.

A fifth said the stream of advice they received in their baby’s first year was mostly unsolicited and contributed to them feeling overwhelmed.

The most common themes to be given unsolicited advice around were revealed to be feeding (44 per cent), what products to buy (38 per cent) and how to soothe tots to sleep (38 per cent).

And while 31 per cent given advice believe it came from a place where others were trying to be genuinely helpful, 27 per cent reckon it’s made them more cautious about hints they may give out.

And eight in 10 even reckon by the time a parent has finished reading all the available baby advice out there, their kid would probably have turned 18 anyway.

Three quarters (76 per cent) were aware of the potential benefits of white noise, to help babies get to sleep, according to the OnePoll.com data.

With 40 per cent also finding it helped calm mum and dad down just as much as baby, and 39 per cent finding some of the noises that did relax the baby ‘strange’.

As parents said they’d used an unusual array of sounds for their ‘soothing’ white noise benefits – including fish tank bubbles (10 per cent), their dishwasher (nine per cent), or even a blender (9%).  

Music producer, Jimmy Day, said: “We have created a textured landscape that moves through spoken word into pure noise.

“The sounds weave through tonal changes that reflect each mood and scenario.

“We used field recordings from the natural world and combining granular sampling to introduce white noise from their origins”.

According to research by Johnson’s Baby, taking into account the average length of a video on TikTok, it would take parents up until their baby’s 8th birthday to consume all of the related parenting advice content.

Sahila Chandihok from the brand said: “We understand the challenges new parents face, and we are committed to providing resources that empower them to make decisions and trust their own instincts.

“Our new white noise playlist is designed to help parents tune out the noise and tune into what truly matters: connecting with their baby.”

TOP 20 ANNOYING OR UNHELPFUL PIECES OF ADVICE NEW PARENTS RECEIVED:

1.    “I always used to do THIS, and my kids turned out fine”

2.    “Sleep when the baby sleeps”

3.    “You’re not holding the baby correctly”

4.    “Babies should be left to cry it out”

5.    “You must have a second baby as otherwise you are selfish/ your other child will suffer/ be spoilt, etc.”

6.    “Don’t let them sleep in your bed with you or they’ll never leave”

7.    ”They’re definitely hungry/tired/gassy”

8.    “Everything’s just a phase”

9.    “The baby’s crying because he/she is over stimulated / over tired”

10.   “If you just relax, the milk will flow / breast-feeding will be easier”

11.   “The child should be in their own room by ‘X months’”

12.   “Don’t rush your babies, they will go at their own pace (crawling, walking, talking, etc.)”

13.   “Bottle feeding is taking the easy route”

14.   “Don’t entertain baby with a screen / TV / iPad / smartphone”

15.   “Dummies will delay speech / ruin teeth”

16.   “Babies just sleep all the time in the first few weeks”

17.   “They sleep lots at first but just wait until the sleep regressions happen”

18.   “Don’t put them in childcare, they need you”

19.   “If you don’t start them on vegetables first when weaning they’ll become picky eaters.”

20.   “You should/shouldn’t go back to work”

Dani Dyer holding Johnson's baby products.
Dani Dyer listens to Johnson Baby’s white noise album, ‘Soothing Sounds’
Dani Dyer holding clothing, with Johnson's Baby products in the background.
Dani Dyer works with the baby brand

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