Beauty is always a subjective concept, influenced by cultural expectations, individual experiences, and societal values. In The Apothecary Diaries, Maomao’s view of her own beauty, or lack thereof stands in stark contrast to how others perceive her.
Even with constant compliments on how beautiful she looks, Maomao still belittles her own looks, using self-deprecating language that puzzles most viewers and readers alike. This inconsistency poses an important question: why does Maomao insist she is not beautiful?
Beauty for her is not just a matter of looks but a carefully cultivated asset used for social and financial leverage. And then there’s her relationship with Jinshi who’s like, absurdly good-looking, which makes her understanding of attractiveness and desirability even more layered.
The concept of stereotypical beauty in The Apothecary Diaries
You see, unlike many of the main characters who have no idea how beautiful they are, Maomao knows perfectly well that she is beautiful. She just keeps it hidden on purpose. She does anything and everything to appear unattractive, such as wearing fake freckles, neglecting her hair and face, and wearing makeup in some weird manner.
Whatever she does, however, her own natural beauty, particularly her incredible eyes and facial expressions, completely shines through for everyone, including Jinshi, who is more and more falling in love with her.
However, Maomao doesn’t care about her appearance because she has low self-esteem, it’s more of a strategic move. Growing up in the Verdigris House, Maomao acknowledges how much influence beauty has and the dangers that accompany it.
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inKusuriyaNoHitorigoto
In the world of The Apothecary Diaries, where women’s worth is often tied to their physical appeal, she simply doesn’t want to draw unnecessary attention to herself. Her failure to acknowledge her own beauty, therefore, isn’t so much a hatred for herself, it’s more about protecting herself.
Moreover, she was reminded constantly that her mother was a legendary beauty, and this may have helped to drive her to minimize her own looks. Being brought up in the shadow of such a reputation may have put subconscious pressure on her to avoid comparisons, so she was not prepared to acknowledge any similarities.
Jinshi complicates matters further. As a man whose handsomeness is more celebrated than that of even the most celebrated courtesans, he is a living contradiction of traditional gendered beauty expectations. His ethereal looks grant him power but also burden him with unwanted admiration and expectations. Maomao, having witnessed the curse of such beauty, may go out of her way to avoid any association with it in a bid to avoid the same fate.
Maomao’s true beauty: Hidden but recognized
In spite of her insistence that she is ordinary, the responses of those around her indicate otherwise. From courtiers to commoners, most recognize Maomao’s special charm and striking looks. Her beauty, though subtle, is undeniable, and even her efforts to conceal it are not entirely successful.
More significantly, her beauty goes beyond physical appearance. Her intelligence, quick wit, and unshakeable independence render her compelling in a manner that goes beyond conventional standards of beauty. It is this blend of qualities that attracts Jinshi to her, not her face, but her mind and spirit.
So ultimately, Maomao’s dynamic with her own looks is a deep and complicated dimension of The Apothecary Diaries. Rather than being delusional or naive, her self-perception is a calculated response to her upbringing, environment, and experiences.
She knows she is attractive but chooses to downplay it for practical reasons, viewing beauty as a double-edged sword rather than an inherent virtue. Her relationship with Jinshi serves to further illustrate this theme, as he too grapples with the pressures of being seen as abnormally beautiful.
Together, their dynamic challenges traditional notions of beauty and highlights the complexities of self-perception in a society that places immense value on physical appearance. And it is a testament to the deeper themes of The Apothecary Diaries, where power, perception, and personal agency intertwine in fascinating ways.
The Apothecary Diaries is currently available to watch on Crunchyroll.
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